While reading this week there was a story about “Jane” and her husband “Aaron.” Jane had a “friend” and although she wasn’t physically intimate, she was emotionally intimate with him and not Aaron, her husband. Sometimes situations seem innocent, but can be very detrimental to marriage. Marriage is supposed to be a way for husband and wife to bond emotionally, spiritually, physically, and intellectually. When we offer any part of that to someone else we are not showing fidelity in marriage. I appreciated the questions posed in that talk and felt that was something I wanted to share. If we find ourselves with a “special friend” we need to ask ourselves these questions:
• “Are you turning to your friend for comfort rather than turning to your spouse?”
• “Do you find yourself thinking about your friend even when you’re at home?”
• “Do you seek opportunities to be with your friend even when work doesn’t require you to be together?”
• “Do you e-mail and text your friend when you’re not together?”
• “Have you told your spouse about these messages?”
• “Does the relationship with your friend take more of your time and energy than your relationship with your spouse?”
• “Do you compare your spouse to your friend?”
• “Would you be uncomfortable introducing your spouse to your friend?”
If you find yourself answering any of these questions with a guilty feeling, it is time to reorganize and prioritize. The relationships we have with our husband or wife are so special. Nothing should ever come between that.
I love my husband with all my heart, and he is truly my best friend. I know that he is not perfect, but neither am I, so together we are able to grow and improve. Too many people let those little imperfections gnaw away at their friendship, and if you find yourself feeling that way, focus on the good your spouse offers. Love him or her with all your heart. Don’t let anyone or anything get between you!
Matheson, K. (2009, September 1). Fidelity in Marriage: It’s More Than You Think. Ensign
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